Our leader was hoping for a peaceful family Easter by spending quality time with his beloved boys after weeks of relentless travel. Good Friday started well with a family breakfast, after which Gordon planned the families Easter egg hunt with his usual tactical astuteness.
In the late morning Gordon's mood darkened as news reached him about Damien McBride's taxpayer funded activities. Then around lunchtime, with the Easter hunt planned, Obama was on the phone.
BO: Happy Easter Gordon. I have news that we have both been hoping for. The G20 summit has worked. The economy has started to pick up. Tim Geithner and Larry Summers are both reporting glimmers of hope.
GB: Oh I see.
BO: Gordon. What is wrong? You do not sound pleased. You have saved the world!
GB: I assume this is private information. You not going to be saying anything in public about green shots?
BO: Of course. I will be making a statement in about an hour. Is this a problem?
GB: Barack, can I be candid?
BO: Please do so.
GB: It is too early for an economic recovery. It is politically unacceptable for there to be one just yet. I am trying to convince voters that I am the person to steer the UK through the worst recession since the 1930’s. This must last until early 2010. I only want green shots to appear in the run-up to the election.
BO: I simply do not understand.
GB: Without the recession I will find it hard to sell myself to the voters. I will have nothing to say to convince people to keep listening to me.
BO: (thinking he was very glad he had met Cameron whilst in the UK) Yes, well, maybe. We should talk again soon.
The phone goes dead. The Easter duty officer walks in to find another smashed mobile phone littered on the carpet.
Aide: I have Derek Draper on the phone denying the e-mails from McBride exist. Mandy is on the other line saying McBride must be sacked before the Sunday papers are published.
The aide observes Brown’s lips quivering with rage as his fists bang the desk.
GB: Get me another mobile phone!
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